glenda.

daddy and i had a REAL serious talk with me on wednesday night he was saying that since i am older than the rest i am able to understand more than my brothers.so he was like"you have to understand why i have to be so harsh on you,at times and i want you to understand that i have my reasons for being harsh."
i felt super guilty when he said that.for the first time i felt so GUILTY.the word was written all over my face!i felt like crying at that point of time.i REALLY regretted what i have done lots.i wished my mind was more sensible last time.now knowing that all he had done was for my own good i really am learining how to appreaciate them.he also said what he did was just for me to have the right attitude toowards what i am doing in life.the attitude i treat the elderly in my family also have to be changed.he pointed out to me that.it have NEVER came across to me that i had been ignoring them,and being stuck to either the computer or the tee-vee.
it had never came across to me that the words that comes out from the mouth like a double edegd sowrd could hurt a person's feelings BADLY.all these while it has always been'I,ME & MYSELF'and not anyone else.i really felt guilty.daddy asked me"are you ready to go to heaven if God comes back now?"i was like totally unsure abt that.so i just answered him"i don't think i am ONE bit ready.i have backslided too much alr." can't even compare with my brother who answered my father straight with a clear answer"YES!"i was totally ashamed at myself.i was like a christian for at least 7yrs and i still could not say i was ready.i really need a breakthru with God.daddy also said he could only theach me how to fish but not help me fish.so all i can conclude is that i can i cannot backslide anymore.i have to really give my all to my heavenly fater who deserves much more than what i am giving unto him.
"i'm sorry lord for all those wrongs i have done.please help me set the right attitude for worship and surrender my all to you lord.please forgive me and help me lead a better life by being a shining light that lights your world.also help me to open a pathway for more people to enter in to your kingdom when you come.so heavenly father please give me the wisdom & knoledge to lead the way for others.thank you lord once again.Amen"